On a weekly basis we discuss common mistakes girls make either before they date someone or in the early stages of dating. Each week, we start with an example of the kind of girl we are talking about. We write from a Christian perspective, but the principles apply to everyone. Join us in our conversation. We'd love to hear if you think we're right on or out of our minds or if you just have a question!
Sunday, June 20, 2010
They Are Too Friend-y
Molly was petite, artsy and loved to dance. She was the person who made each party great. She had tons of friends and loved life. She was constantly surrounded by guys, but had never been asked on a date! Why? Because she is too friend-y! She sends off friend vibes to all of the guys!
Most of you have guy friends. You have convinced yourself that you are not attracted to your guy friends and that you would never date him. You’re lying to yourself! If your best guy friend started singing a love song to you and then confessed his undying love - you might just melt! You have convinced yourself that you LIKE having a million guy friends who come to you for advice on what to get their girlfriends for Valentine’s Day! You’re lying to yourself!!! You want to be the one who has a date this year for Valentine’s Day! Though you love having friends, you would LOVE a date!
These habits are hard to change but here are some guidelines to help you:
1) Practice all of these guidelines in this book on all of the guys (friends, crushes and store clerks) in your life. Dress cute. Be approachable. Be flirty. Be fun! Study this book and live it!
2) You have plenty of fun girlfriends! You don’t need more guy friends. Make the guys talk to other girls about how excited they are to take you on a date and get you the perfect birthday gift! Make the guys talk to the other girls who are the “perpetual friend” about how he is planning the sweetest proposal to put the perfect diamond on YOUR finger! Every guy in your life is potentially Mr. Amazing - treat them like it!
3) DO NOT BE FRIENDS after breaking up. It is impossible to be “just friends” with a guy when you’ve been emotionally attached within recent history. (If you dated him in elementary or middle school you can be friends!) You are bound to relive past emotions and end up allowing the same guy back into your heart. When you end a relationship with a guy, do not say, “I just want to be friends.” This misleads guys to believe they still have a chance with you. Just say, “This relationship is not going to go any further.” Or as one women commented, “Just tell to go jump off a cliff!”
Remember: You don’t want more friends. You want a husband!
Challenge: Begin to practice the principles from the previous chapter with your guy friends. See if anything changes.
Have you been applying the challenges each of the past weeks? If so, what are your experiences? If not, why not?!?
Do you have any questions, comments or concerns about this chapter?